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Cashblowing with Patrick O'Sullivan E-mail
Written by Hextall454   
Wednesday, 17 March 2010 12:56

Hi everybody, Patrick O'Sullivan of the Edmonton Oilers here.  As a penance for my -32 rating, Commissioner Bettman has asked a favor of me in exchange for convincing Kevin Lowe not to demote me to the AHL.  I'm supposed to visit the blogs whilst wearing all green, drop a hearty "Top O' the Morning!" on you and pimp some of the fine holiday-themed producted for sale over at NHL Shop.

However, what Mr. Bettman doesn't realize is that I'm not from Ireland.  I've never been to Ireland.  And I fucking hated The Commitments.  So rather than a cheery sales pitch that encourages you to bring your credit card to the end of the rainbow, I'm going to sit here in my recliner, pop some Lucky Charms and whiskey, and do some open mocking of this fine Irish merchandise.

Well look at that.  Ovechkin's green t-shirt jersey is the top seller in the whole store.  You know, I'd like to think that sometimes he scored goals entirely based on luck, but the dude's got skills.  First reader to buy one and ship it to Brian Campbell's hospital room will get to have a pint with me!

It appears that the NHL has all 23 of their Irish items on sale for only four teams: Detroit, Chicago, Boston, and Philly.  Pittsburgh is just behind them with 22 possible items.  The one they left out? The women's boxer shorts above.  Wise move, NHL.  Wise.  Move.

Dallas wears green year-round.  They only have three items.  I'm pretty sure they could have snuck in some crap you don't buy year-round to up their numbers.

Hey Frenchies, Ed Hardy isn't an Irishman.  Cut it out.  Oui?

Oh that's fair.  I can't buy an O'Sullivan green jersey, but you make one for Marian Gaborik?  That's real fucking fair.  I met him once.  He thought Colin Farrell was a Scot!  Bah!

Comments (3)Add Comment
...
written by TheRoyalHalf, March 18, 2010
Why stop with St. Patrick's Day, NHL? Why not have brown gear for Arbor Day or just sell NJ Devils throwbacks on Christmas?

And yeah... why isn't O'Sullivan in the AHL? Are warm bodies that hard to come by for the Oilers?
...
written by Bonzai!!!!, March 18, 2010
What advantage, really, does a woman enjoying wearing a boxer over a brief? That doesn't make no sense....
respond this topic
written by AngelicaHill, April 01, 2010
Various people in the world receive the personal loans in different banks, just because it is easy.

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Last Updated on Wednesday, 17 March 2010 17:14
 

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