You probably wouldn’t think that the fictional demonic mascot of a British heavy metal band would have much insight on the workings of the National Hockey League. Prepare to be surprised. Eddie, above, is a huge fan of Weed’s Making Puck postings (and, apparently, only of the Eastern Conference). When he emailed me his thoughts on the season so far, I found them surprisingly cogent. Also, he threatened to eat my children if I didn’t post them. So, uh, cheers, Eddie!

Alexander the Great/His name struck fear into hearts of men/Alexander the Great/Became a legend ‘mongst mortal men. Everyone already knew about Alexander Ovechkin (13G, 17A). But what about Alexander Semin (13G, 14A)? If having one Alexander is Great, does having two make the Capitals a Cup contender? Probably not, so long as Brent Johnson is their best goaltender.

What did I see can I believe that what I saw/That night was real and not just fantasy/Just what I saw in my old dreams were they/reflections of my warped mind staring back at me. Ryan O’Byrne is still having nightmares. Oh, it was real all right, Ryan. As was this horrendous giveaway and subsequent undressing by Johan Franzen. Luckily for him, the Canadiens have a solid team, and they won’t miss him at all after his body washes up in Parc de la Merci.

When you think that we’ve used all our chances/And the chance to make everything right/Keep on making the same old mistakes/Makes untipping the balance so easy/When we’re living our lives on the edge/Say a prayer on the Book of the Dead. What is it about the Leafs? They recently held a very emotional ceremony retiring Wendel Clark’s number. Naturally, they lost the game. The new coach, Ron Wilson, isn’t really any better than the old coach. Now, of course, as was widely expected, Brian Burke has signed on as President and GM. Unless Brian has a copy of the Book of the Dead tucked under that perfectly coiffed hair, does anyone really think that will make any difference?

Another prophet of disaster/Who says the ship is lost/Another prophet of disaster/Leaving you to count the cost. How many ways did the aborted Barry Melrose Experiment cost everyone involved? Tampa management looked fickle, inexperienced and prone to panic and dramatic, meaningless gestures. Melrose looked like when it comes to coaching, he makes a great TV analyst. Maybe, looking back at that 1993 season, some guys named Gretzky, Kurri, Robitaille and Blake had more to do with it than the Mullet.

Take my hand I’ll lead you to the promised land/Take my hand I’ll give you immortality. Marc Savard is really, really good. He even seems to have made a believer out of his teammates. While having the Bruins back in Cup contention would only be a good thing for the NHL, it would be a horrendous blow to all non-douchey sports fans. I foresee many pink Bruins sweaters being opened beneath New England Christmas trees.

Can it be there’s some sort of error/Hard to stop the surmounting terror/Is it really the end not some crazy dream? Martin Brodeur has been a fixture in net in New Jersey for 15 years, accumulating 3 Stanley Cups and goaltending stats that put him in the “best-ever” conversation. But a torn biceps tendon will have him out for months, at least. Devils fans must surely feel late-night pangs of fear that this is the end of the Brodeur Era, as they hold their breath with Kevin Weekes in net.

Thank you for your consideration, MYFOnians. As a Brit talking about the NHL, this was really the most appropriate song to leave you with.